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Comments:
I do ask questions, but it is easy to lie about direct questions. I don't know if you remember that show "Lie to Me"... or that video I posted about lie spotting. I'm pretty uncanny in my ability to be able to tell IRL when I'm not getting the whole story from someone. It used to make me a lot more anxious and angry because I'm super sensitive to it. What I've learned over the years (thanks to that show and that research, believe it or not)... is that yes, people CAN be lying or evasive about something... but you don't really know why. It is only by getting to know someone that you get a sense of whether it is done to manipulate you, to protect themselves, or to protect someone else. Sometimes, it is just that they don't know me well enough or trust ME. Which is understandable.
This also goes hand in hand with playing hard to get. On paper everything makes sense to me. I understand that I need other stuff going on in my life and not be boggled down on every situation with a woman. It's just when I find someone I'm attracted to, I genuinely want to get to know them better, but instead something about my advances shows everything that turns a woman off. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. I should take a break from dating and reaccess.
Yes I understood that it was most recent guy who totally disappeared. But also thought this contractor guy "drifted" away which is some version of disappear to me as well. Ok, even if that wasn't a "bad" drifting, I stand by my original advice--no talk, let him pin you down.
And four, it does bother me that she went out and signed up for an internet dating service the day after we had our big argument. I do not mean this to come across in a selfish way but it seems to me that if she was truly in love with me as deeply as she said then she would not be able to do something like this the very next day after a fight. Shouldn't she mope for at least a few days? I know I did. That two day separation we had made me absolutely miserable. Even if she thought that we were broken up permanently it still seems like she should have been too depressed for at least a few days to start thinking about other guys. This whole thing seems like a big red flag to me.